Becoming inordinately fond of someone after only a glimpse of them - the passionate but simple crush generally termed "puppy love" - isn't unusual among children, male or female. I wouldn't say it's as romantic and sweet as many people seem to think, but it's not exactly squicky either. Same with doing something extra-nice for someone because you like them and think they're pretty, so you're willing to take a bit of a risk you wouldn't for most people. That's altruism with some personal gain behind it - not necessarily "So you'll be my girlfriend," but because "I like you; here's something I wouldn't do for most people." Again, I'm really not seeing the creepy.
There's plenty of uncomfortable bullshit about the way Peeta's suddenly taking charge now, but to extend it back to the puppy-love crush is just kind of overshooting. Are you accusing a five-year-old of Nice Guy Syndrome and rapey intentions? Seriously? As for the bread incident, he had a crush on a girl and so he did something nice for her. That's not creepy. That's... well, actually that's pretty much normal. Now, if he expected sexual favors in return for it, THAT would be creepy. Or even if he expected a kiss - that would, at the very least, make him an asshole and erase any trace of altruism. See the difference, though?
I know I keep playing Devil's Advocate here on this subject, and there's a reason for it. While you've been very mild for the most part with the LJ brand of feminism here - you're not tossing out buzzwords every other paragraph, and you aren't completely blind to the uncomfortable behavior on the girl's part as well - you're still really reaching to find the rape factor here. Peeta's passive-aggressive, whiney, pathetic and often selfish, though I think Katniss still has him far surpassed in that last department, but he's not a rapist. Having a crush on someone you've never spoken to and doing her a favor doesn't make you a rapist. Hinting for a kiss when you're delirious and possibly about to die doesn't make you a rapist. It's stupid, and annoying to the girl who's just trying to save your life and doesn't have time for this bullshit, but there's no need to go further and turn it into a squicky sexual-predator implication.
Same with "totally wanting to fuck her" when they're cuddling together. Of COURSE he does. There's a big difference between "wanting to" and doing. Last I checked, wanting was not a crime. I know my boyfriend wanted sex long before I did, and fantasized about it while we were cuddling sometimes, but never did anything more than that until I was ready - never so much as a backrub without my leave. Again, something you're making out to be creepy really isn't, and it's not necessary to make that much of a stretch to make Peeta unlikeable. He already is, trust me. First he was whiny and pathetic, then he was a lovesick burden, and now he's becoming petulantly bossy (and she's rolling with it like the soft-cored essentially weak female protagonist she actually is), and none of these things are likeable. But comparing his behavior to rape? Barking up the wrong tree. If anything, admitting his feelings puts him at a disadvantage; she could totally use that against him, and in a way she is, but for the most part she seems to think she should just go along with it. I put that on her, not on him. She's supposed to be a strong female protagonist. She ought to be able to make her own decisions regardless of his whining, pleading, or sob stories.
Ugh, long-winded rant is long-winded. Sorry. I've agreed with pretty much all of your other points except this one - the one-sided treatment of dubious relationships is a pet peeve of mine. This star-crossed lovers business and the horrible contrivances meant to draw them together are a disservice to both characters, not just the girl. He's as much a victim of the bad writing as she is, and if she gets a pass on that, so should he.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2012-03-24 09:46 pm (UTC)There's plenty of uncomfortable bullshit about the way Peeta's suddenly taking charge now, but to extend it back to the puppy-love crush is just kind of overshooting. Are you accusing a five-year-old of Nice Guy Syndrome and rapey intentions? Seriously? As for the bread incident, he had a crush on a girl and so he did something nice for her. That's not creepy. That's... well, actually that's pretty much normal. Now, if he expected sexual favors in return for it, THAT would be creepy. Or even if he expected a kiss - that would, at the very least, make him an asshole and erase any trace of altruism. See the difference, though?
I know I keep playing Devil's Advocate here on this subject, and there's a reason for it. While you've been very mild for the most part with the LJ brand of feminism here - you're not tossing out buzzwords every other paragraph, and you aren't completely blind to the uncomfortable behavior on the girl's part as well - you're still really reaching to find the rape factor here. Peeta's passive-aggressive, whiney, pathetic and often selfish, though I think Katniss still has him far surpassed in that last department, but he's not a rapist. Having a crush on someone you've never spoken to and doing her a favor doesn't make you a rapist. Hinting for a kiss when you're delirious and possibly about to die doesn't make you a rapist. It's stupid, and annoying to the girl who's just trying to save your life and doesn't have time for this bullshit, but there's no need to go further and turn it into a squicky sexual-predator implication.
Same with "totally wanting to fuck her" when they're cuddling together. Of COURSE he does. There's a big difference between "wanting to" and doing. Last I checked, wanting was not a crime. I know my boyfriend wanted sex long before I did, and fantasized about it while we were cuddling sometimes, but never did anything more than that until I was ready - never so much as a backrub without my leave. Again, something you're making out to be creepy really isn't, and it's not necessary to make that much of a stretch to make Peeta unlikeable. He already is, trust me. First he was whiny and pathetic, then he was a lovesick burden, and now he's becoming petulantly bossy (and she's rolling with it like the soft-cored essentially weak female protagonist she actually is), and none of these things are likeable. But comparing his behavior to rape? Barking up the wrong tree. If anything, admitting his feelings puts him at a disadvantage; she could totally use that against him, and in a way she is, but for the most part she seems to think she should just go along with it. I put that on her, not on him. She's supposed to be a strong female protagonist. She ought to be able to make her own decisions regardless of his whining, pleading, or sob stories.
Ugh, long-winded rant is long-winded. Sorry. I've agreed with pretty much all of your other points except this one - the one-sided treatment of dubious relationships is a pet peeve of mine. This star-crossed lovers business and the horrible contrivances meant to draw them together are a disservice to both characters, not just the girl. He's as much a victim of the bad writing as she is, and if she gets a pass on that, so should he.