I shouldn't find this half so funny.

[farla]

So about two weeks ago I reviewed this utterly crappy story. I didn't give my usual review because, well, just look at it. Instead I just left a short review to the effect of it being melodramatic, cliche, sueish and a bad ripoff of Mewtwo's background. Yeah, I'm a bitch.

So today I get a review reply. Today.

if that's what you think, then read further. don't judge a book by its cover...
or a story by its beginning. things are always different when you look closer.

The story's just been updated. The new chapter is also utterly crappy. It's actually worse, which I didn't quite realize was possible.

So I send a PM back. Hey, at least I didn't review.

The sad thing here is you're actually right. Your story is sueish garbage - you're obviously not that bright, so I'll just say that this isn't a matter of 'judging a beginning' so much as Jesus H Christ, that's the crappiest made up pokemon ever - but yes, your second chapter is far more horrible than the first.
Congrats.

Which is not nice, yes, but oh so very satisfying. 'Don't judge by the first whatever' is a pet peeve of mine. If the backstory in the first chapter is crap, it's still going to be crap no matter what your second chapter is.

And I get:

Or, maybe, you're just too hopelessly idiotic to know talent when you see it.
Now, leave me alone, there's a sale on brains on eBAY, you should go buy one.

She's so right.

Experiment Final Option

“Professor Taiken!” the lab assistant said. “It’s awake!”

“Good, good,” Professor Taiken of Team Rocket said. “How are you, Dratimew? Would you like to battle?”

The Pokemon glared at him, trying to pull free from its restraints.

“Draa! Dratimew dramew! Dramewmew!” it said angrily. (I’m not your plaything! I’m a Pokemon, and I want my freedom! Set me free!)

“That’s where you’re wrong, Dratimew. You are our plaything,” Taiken said. “You always will be.”

“Dramew draa dramewmew!” the dragon-type Pokemon said. (No, I’m not!)

It broke its restraints with Psychic, then used Hyper Beam to destroy the lab’s western wall. Then it used its telepathy to give its creators one last message before it left.

I am NO ONE’S plaything. I will not be restrained. You can’t control me… ever.

The blue and white kitten-like Pokemon flew out through the destroyed wall, only stopping to send a Dragonbreath attack back at the lab. Then she flew to a cliff several miles away from the small island laboratory.

I am Arishanne, a Dratimew, and Team Rocket’s ‘Final Option’ experiment. But Team Rocket used and mistreated me, so I escaped. Now I’m on the run, fleeing my creators. For now, as the only one of my kind, I stand alone.

Yeah, I just don't know talent when I see it.

I have to go now and laugh for a few hours for a completely unrelated reason.

Comments

[banzaisebastian.livejournal.com]

...Did she just say Dratimew? As in... Dratini and Mew?

....

[points] AH HA HA HA HA!

[farla.livejournal.com]

Don't be ridiculous.

...it's a dratini, dragonair, and mew, as explained in the summary.

I hope I don't sound too mean...

[maidensrage.livejournal.com]

but that name is a heck of a mouthful to say. It's short, but it just sounds so awkward.

(And ridiculous, says my mean side.)

[banzaisebastian.livejournal.com]

And I thought hot Skitty on Wailord action was as wrong as the Pokemon world would ever get.

[wintersheir]

D: WHYYYYYYY

[farla.livejournal.com]

You never considered threesomes, then?

Though really, I don't know why everyone's so hung up on wailord. I mean, magmar/jynx is snuff.

[lil-ida.livejournal.com]

I'm guessing you've seen Endgame's sig at GameFAQs.

[charizamdc.livejournal.com]

Well, she doesn't seem to have taken in any of what you said. So it's good you had fun, because otherwise you'd have wasted whatever time you spent talking to her.

Seeing fics like this pains me - why didn't she have the sense to call it a parody of mewtwo fics and then posted it on Serebii?

[farla.livejournal.com]

A lot of my reviews tend to linger on, so even if she just ignores it now, it's done its intended job of making her consider the idea not all readers like her story and that they might not like specific parts which could be changed.

Seeing fics like this pains me - why didn't she have the sense to call it a parody of mewtwo fics and then posted it on Serebii?
If she knew how bad it was, she wouldn't have wrote it.