Reviews

[farla]

You know what's worse than stupid, fawning reviews to pieces of junk? Stupid, fawning pretend constructive criticism that's full of bad advice and complements to to a piece of junk.

I hate my fandom so much.

Comments

Oooh Wow!

[(Anonymous)]

OMGOMG!11! Advice on how to turn a crappy half-assed sue into a tedious drawn out sue! YAY!

Re: Oooh Wow!

[farla.livejournal.com]

Yeah. The best part is that there's no mention of things like, say, putting periods at the ends of sentences, which I'd consider a little more important than advice on how to pad a boring self insert's pokemon battles add detail.

The scales of evil

[(Anonymous)]

I'm not so sure. Stupid fawning reviews have a cetain mindless repeditive quality that really makes me start to wonder about the rest of the people in the Pokemon section. Either they are really stupid, or just are so wrapped up in trying to get other people to review their own works that they give good reviews, which are an insult to anyone who has ever written something of any quality.

Aerol Somtaaw, fellow author, long-time listener, first time caller

[(Anonymous)]

She did raise some good points, the same points I try to raise when I review certain authors. Though really I only mean to help and rarely do I flat out praise works. In fact, I've really only been impressed by one fan fic in my nearly 4 years on FanFiction.net.

You're lucky you didn't see her attempt at a Digimon fic, Farla. It was just a character profile page filled with very unrealistic and uncreative Digimon. Every character was ruined but opposing characterizations. She had a what seemed like a very sweet and charming friendly kid who lives with a pair of adopted parents who seems like a bit of a hopeless romantic (like a less abrasive Brock), but she ruined his characterization by adding in bits like "He's jealous", or "He's the lead's rival" and "He's a pervert" >_<;.

I pity the poor girl really.

Re: Aerol Somtaaw, fellow author, long-time listener, first time caller

[farla.livejournal.com]

Yeah, TopazSoarhire did give some advice which could be useful, but this is a review to someone who didn't bother to put periods at the end of half her sentences. She doesn't need to be told how to add detail. That's not the issue. As usual, TopazSoarhire didn't even bother giving a customized review, just gave general advice that has nothing to do with the story. Plus, I'm really getting annoyed by TopazSoarhire's tendency to say 'don't do this because people might accuse you of making a sue even though she totally isn't in any way' in response to blatant sueness. And if you read her examples, you see they refer to a thirteen year old getting their first pokemon. Gah. So it's writing advice from a mediocre writer with no grasp of canon.

[katei3.livejournal.com]

Why? Why did I read that review? Now I have a headache.

Isn't it obvious why she gave such a nausea-inducing "wonderfully instructive" review? Its so readers can fawn over her excellent review-ness, and be coerced to read her stories for more examples of excellent literary crap.

"Oh! You are so smart! And look how nice you are! Instead of giving advice that might make the writer feel bad you spout out a bout of general crap that helps everyone in the whole wide world! What could we do without you, Topazsoarhire? Here, let's write a flattering review to your fic! ::sigh of hopeless admiration::"

Excuse me whilst I puke.

[farla.livejournal.com]

^^ You should have seen the reviews she used to leave. Let me paraphrase.

Wow! You are a very talented author. I only noticed a few very very minor things which aren't bad in any way but could be made even better. I have a site (insert url) that has tutorials on writing which would help you.

I saw about a dozen of these. Then she reviewed on of my stories with, to paraphrase, Wow! You are a very talented author. This story is a very good tutorial thing. I have a site (insert url for everyone reading the story's reviews) that has tutorials on writing so could I put this there?

I bitched at her in the next chapter, telling her I have an email and to stop plugging the site. It seems she has.

Did I mention the tutorials are horrible? There's one listing all the different words you can use instead of 'said', for example, and saying not to use 'said'. I can just see it now.

"Hello Professor!" Gary Stu ejaculated.

"Why hello Gary Stu," the professor growled.

"I'm here for my first pokemon," Gary Stu asked.

"Oh, come over to the table," the professor screeched.

"Wow!" Gary Stu whispered.

...it's advice from a not-very-good author to even worse authors. The blind leading the blind.

[katei3.livejournal.com]

::falls over in helpless laugher::

I can see it now :)


"Which one do you want?" the professor trumpeted.

"Hmm. Bulbasaur," Gary Stu testified.

"Sorry. We're out of Bulbasaur," the professor asseverated.

"Oh. Then Charmander," Gary Stu avouched.

"Sorry, we're out of that too," the professor caterwauled. "But here; have a Mewtwo."

"My heavens! Thank you!" Gary Stu stridulated.



hehe.

Oh yes, I've noticed her various plugs as well. And her site is... Well, it's dedicated to her OC. That should say something at least.

You actually read it? 0_0

[(Anonymous)]

What was she thinking? Blue font on a black background?
I literally had to highlight everything. Thank GOD ff.net doesn't let you use colored font and backgrounds or else we might have stories where Suethors make their OTs have flashy rainbow names or make their font a bright pink on a black background. TOTUHLI PXNK!!

Re: You actually read it? 0_0

[farla.livejournal.com]

Ever seen light yellow text over complex images? Makes her look almost sane.

FFN used to allow you to choose the color and size of the words. If you look far enough back you can actually find some, with varying levels of readability. If it hadn't been stopped we'd probably be getting light pick on white by now. We'd also probably have half the readers going blind.

[wintersheir]

"Hello Professor!" Gary Stu ejaculated.

xDDD

*ahem* Anyway...I seriously feel your pain. TopazSelfInsert makes me ill... I used to read her stuff until it finally made my brain explode. Oi.

[farla.livejournal.com]

Yeah. The sad part is that for the pokemon fandom, she's a competent author. After reading all the other stories where the author has no clue, someone who can at least narrate properly, even if it's about a boring character, is worshiped. Anyone looks good in comparison.

[katei3.livejournal.com]

hmmm...and speaking of fandoms, what other anime do you like? You only list pokemon in your interests.

[farla.livejournal.com]

I like a lot of anime, far too many to list. Popular ones like Inuyasha, less well known ones like Now and Then, Here and There, cult ones like Lain...I tend not to write in other fandoms, though. Hm...I wonder if there's Boogiepop Phantom fanfiction.

[katei3.livejournal.com]

Yay! You like Inuyasha too! That makes me happy.
Boogiepop Phantom....hmm...you mentioned that in your profile too. I'll look it up online.

[wintersheir]

"I hate my fandom so much."

Amen! It's gotten to the point where I'll read any piece of junk as long as it's an OT 'fic. I need to take my life back... x_X some of your writings have helped snap me out of it. I'm forever in your debt. xD