WAT

[farla]

I'm amazed at the character development that you've placed within the story, the way Eon fights so hard for the sake of Pokémon and her dedication towards the cause of Pokémon rights. I have to admit, it's impressive, I knew that if I kept writing a review that started out as complimenting your writing style, well sure as shootin' you'd get hooked into reading it and then I'd be able to say this: GOOD LORD. I'm gonna be honest, writing styles are kind of like the "you are what you eat" deal, and you just went and gobbled down a big old sadist, didn't cha? Killing off a little kid in the forest, having all those Pokémon murder their trainers? And for what? JUSTICE?!

And then there's the OTHER side, humans ENSLAVING their Pokémon! Forcing them to obey!
I'm sorry if you feel that I'm being unfair, but at least I'm being honest. You can judge me if you want to, but there's a pattern in my work: the good guys always have at least one small edge that makes them stronger than the bad guys. In your story, I can't see the light. Sorry if that offends you, but I calls 'em as I sees 'em.

The worst thing you've done is "message rape". This is what happens when you take the idea behind an anime or game and just pervert the HELL out of it. Time and time again Ash, and most people in the Pokémon world, are shown to actually CARE about Pokémon, not just as "pets" but as actual friends and partners. Ash risks his life constantly to keep Pokémon from being endangered or hurt by evil humans, and the Pokémon themselves have said "Pokémon are only bad because master is bad". Meowth is an exception, but the reverse is true: HUMANS are generally good as well, showing love and concern for their Pokémon and for others.

The whole Pokémon anime is based off of the bonds of friendship and how an underdog (Ash) works together with his Pokémon to become truly great…and along the way he continuously helps others, going out of his way to do good. What you’ve done is taken the basic message of Pokémon and bastardized it. You raped the message. And several of the characters, Pikachu included.

It would be ONE thing if your work had some faint glimmer of "hope" in it. Some "light" that showed that ultimately, there was justice waiting for your creation Eon and that he'd be punished for the horrific cruelty that’s been perpetuated by Eon and the Pokémon, or that the humans and Pokémon will reach some form of true understanding, then it would alright…

But there seems to be little of that shown in any of your story here...and the worst part is you seem to REVEL in the brutality Eon and the Pokémon perform. Haven’t you ever heard of the Law of Human Nature? There’s a REASON why the great civilizations all agree on certain things like murder not being okay, not having any woman you like as a wife and that child molestation is just wrong.

A road that makes you enjoy the suffering of other people, regardless of who they are...THAT is a dark road to follow, Farla. A very, very dark road. You should be careful. I hope, if nothing else, this review makes you THINK. You have great talent for writing, but the way you use it seriously frightens me...

Sincerely...

Nick

Comments

[farla.livejournal.com]

If you only read those two sentences, it looks like they aaaalmost understood the 'fic.

On reflection, I think that's simply communication failure. At a guess, what they were going for was "The pokemon are killing innocent people, but you're claiming that's justice (when it isn't). Also, you're saying people do horrible things (no they don't). So you've done TWO THINGS wrong!"

Which ties into their whole "my way is the only right way" thing - in their version of pokemon, there's no enslaving pokemon, and therefore it's a lie to say they do.

Honestly, not working with the cheesy friendship-happiness message of the anime--when will you open your eyes and learn you're doing it wrong, Farla?

What message, I ask you? I mean, there was that episode where Ash tells his pokemon to stand still and get beat up so that Team Rocket won't break a window and get random stranger he just met that episode in more trouble. I mean, if I was doing this to an anime with the legitimate friendship message, I could at least understand where he was coming from, but Pokemon? To say they only give lip service to the concept is to drastically overstate their commitment.

And the profile...yeah. If people list their OCs in the profile, they're bad writers. I don't know why, but it's a law of reality. Apparently he's got one named Nick and thinks a stu is as valid a writing choice as a crossover, too.

[negrek.livejournal.com]

What message, I ask you?

Well, Ash has spouted off the "Pokeymanz is our friends!" line enough times to gag an elementary school student. The fact that his treatment of his little friends isn't so friendly is totally irrelevant--it's his *verbal* message that matters!

[ember-reignited.livejournal.com]

...

Oh, great. Now I'm going to start thinking of Ash as "the GPMAT."

[ember-reignited.livejournal.com]

and thinks a stu is as valid a writing choice as a crossover, too.

Not only that, but tropes and plot elements are tools. Like, you know paintbrushes.

Also, he named his IZ Stu Invader Darth.

And I am not touching the Lilo and Stitch stuff with a ten foot pole.