Pokemon Fanfiction Academy, Chapter Two!
Aug. 15th, 2004 10:38 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
farlaOh, it's a glorious, glorious thing, truly it is...
It opens with "All around the earth, a momentous event was about to begin; the world was about see the beginning of a form of salvation. Of course, to the saviors… they didn’t know that, and to one savior in particular it was too early to even be awake."
I could understand if LadyUmbra was just mentioning salvation as an extreme synonym for what will happen to the writers, but nope, they'll be the saviors somehow.
Next, an abra teleports off our dear protagonist, Kayla. When this happens, they "glowed a sparkling blackish purple" for some reason, despite all the times in the anime that teleportation has not involved that.
At this point we're introduced to a couple more mistakes (your/you're, words that should be capitalized but aren't). I won't keep mentioning them, but I feel the need to point out that no, there isn't improvement.
We continue along into the story and come across the line "then in anime fashion, her cheeks reddened". Because of course in the real world people don't blush.
The story continues along. Another character mentions that ralts were also used in teleporting the writers in. This irks me because while abra automatically know teleport and seem to specialize in it, ralts learn it at L16 and there's no sign they're especially skilled. Besides, if abra work, why would they also be using another kind of pokemon too?
The author refers to 'the manga' -_-;. Nevermind there's more than one and there are different characters and storylines.
Then there are a bunch of lines about how everyone has to help everyone because they're going to fail or pass as a group. Why? Let's have LadyUmbra's own grandiose dialogue explain! "Fanfiction is an art and can only prosper when the artist has talent, skill, and means. However, our art is dying and becoming a black hole of bad fanfiction. As each of you pass here having learned all the lessons necessary and hopefully having regained the spark to write well again, you must remember you are but one person. If everyone hear strives to improve not only themselves, but their fellow writers until there is no one who fights to improve alone, then, and only then, can you quell the tides of bad fanfiction and restore our art to it glory!" Because LadyUmbra certainly takes it that seriously ::rolls eyes::
It continues and we come to the line "Gary, she noted, looked a cross between smug and nervous." Liek, OMG!!! Look at the author reduce the character to his most basic feature, making him a cardboard cutout and utterly ignoring his later character development! It's incredible!
And then there's "The Cleffa can sense a stalking fan from a mile away and they’ve been trained to literally ‘pound’ you into submission.”
The rest of the students laughed. A great deal of them had no fondness for baby Pokémon, but they had to admit that the idea was unique… although some of them were now wondering how they would get close to their favorite characters…"
Note LadyUmbra's use of the characters to praise herself, and that subtle burst of irony when you realize that the idea is far from unique, considering anti-glomp creatures are used in just about every one of these stories.
We continue and come across this passage: "“They can attack us? But isn’t that against the rules of Pokémon? That a Pokémon can't attack a human?” a young girl called out.
"Minis aren’t Pokémon per say, they’re name mistakes and this is learning through pain, young lady."
Inability to tell the difference between canon and fanon? Checkity check check.
When I saw the first chapter I was worried, but now I realize the story will serve a vital purpose in teaching authors. Don't do what LadyUmbra does.
It opens with "All around the earth, a momentous event was about to begin; the world was about see the beginning of a form of salvation. Of course, to the saviors… they didn’t know that, and to one savior in particular it was too early to even be awake."
I could understand if LadyUmbra was just mentioning salvation as an extreme synonym for what will happen to the writers, but nope, they'll be the saviors somehow.
Next, an abra teleports off our dear protagonist, Kayla. When this happens, they "glowed a sparkling blackish purple" for some reason, despite all the times in the anime that teleportation has not involved that.
At this point we're introduced to a couple more mistakes (your/you're, words that should be capitalized but aren't). I won't keep mentioning them, but I feel the need to point out that no, there isn't improvement.
We continue along into the story and come across the line "then in anime fashion, her cheeks reddened". Because of course in the real world people don't blush.
The story continues along. Another character mentions that ralts were also used in teleporting the writers in. This irks me because while abra automatically know teleport and seem to specialize in it, ralts learn it at L16 and there's no sign they're especially skilled. Besides, if abra work, why would they also be using another kind of pokemon too?
The author refers to 'the manga' -_-;. Nevermind there's more than one and there are different characters and storylines.
Then there are a bunch of lines about how everyone has to help everyone because they're going to fail or pass as a group. Why? Let's have LadyUmbra's own grandiose dialogue explain! "Fanfiction is an art and can only prosper when the artist has talent, skill, and means. However, our art is dying and becoming a black hole of bad fanfiction. As each of you pass here having learned all the lessons necessary and hopefully having regained the spark to write well again, you must remember you are but one person. If everyone hear strives to improve not only themselves, but their fellow writers until there is no one who fights to improve alone, then, and only then, can you quell the tides of bad fanfiction and restore our art to it glory!" Because LadyUmbra certainly takes it that seriously ::rolls eyes::
It continues and we come to the line "Gary, she noted, looked a cross between smug and nervous." Liek, OMG!!! Look at the author reduce the character to his most basic feature, making him a cardboard cutout and utterly ignoring his later character development! It's incredible!
And then there's "The Cleffa can sense a stalking fan from a mile away and they’ve been trained to literally ‘pound’ you into submission.”
The rest of the students laughed. A great deal of them had no fondness for baby Pokémon, but they had to admit that the idea was unique… although some of them were now wondering how they would get close to their favorite characters…"
Note LadyUmbra's use of the characters to praise herself, and that subtle burst of irony when you realize that the idea is far from unique, considering anti-glomp creatures are used in just about every one of these stories.
We continue and come across this passage: "“They can attack us? But isn’t that against the rules of Pokémon? That a Pokémon can't attack a human?” a young girl called out.
"Minis aren’t Pokémon per say, they’re name mistakes and this is learning through pain, young lady."
Inability to tell the difference between canon and fanon? Checkity check check.
When I saw the first chapter I was worried, but now I realize the story will serve a vital purpose in teaching authors. Don't do what LadyUmbra does.
